Meet a 21st-Century repentant.

Atoning for whiteness.

No such bourgeois silliness as having God in her life or believing in sin, but only that of being white, and by golly she feels just terrible about it. What to do, what to do? How to express requisite meae maximae culpae?

Mortification of the flesh is out–it hurts!–but some form of punishment to self is in order, a sort of self-flagellation-lite. And behold! The dame has found oh-so-easy penance by holding up a poster in the public square proclaiming not only does she as a white person suck, but, in the spirit of collectivism, all white people suck.

A thought crosses the mind though. Do whites claiming victim status, e.g., those who identify as LGBTQI+, suck as well?Perhaps do they suck less? Does there exist a proportional measure of victimhood to suckness? Or is it more complicated, with sufficient variables requiring calculus to determine the exact degree how much, say, a white, but BIPOC pederast sucks in contrast with a straight white Catholic Marine, married with children? Or could it even be a blond, blue-eyed male Skowegian is free from the stain of whiteness so long as there’s a strain of victimhood in his mix?

All food for thought the above, but for the nonce let us empathize with the lady above as she acknowledges and bewails her manifold sins and wickedness of being white. May she at last find peace, at least until tomorrow and she’s out there again.

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Published by Isaac Bickerstaff, Esq.

Founder of the London Tatler, Bickerstaff removed West to found the Taos Tatler.

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